Happy Black Friday, peeps! First, I want to admit my envy of people who have fun holiday gatherings. If you are fortunate to have a family that rolls with the punches, consider yourself lucky. Seriously. I'm too angry to get into specifics, but let's just say Dr. Phil would salivate over some of these stories.
It's rivalry week so allegedly anything goes. Right now I'm watchings the Ducks vs Beavers and apparently, these animals have hideous fashion sense if you look at the uniforms. That quacked me up.
UGA vs GT- autocorrect had UGA coming up as UGANDA, but Athens is really a nice place. Poor Aaron Murray. The guy gets hurt against Kentucky so enter the law firm of Hutson Mason. GT runs the triple option which is as exciting as watching bread toast. UGA should win, but you just never know what you are getting with this team. I wouldn't be surprised in the least if they lost, and this game will be a nail biter like one of those "On The Case with Paula Zahn" shows. Bring out the Raid. Dawgs by a paw.
Michigan vs Ohio State-Have I ever told you how much I love Colin Cowherd? He cracks me up on his commentary of the Big 10 and OSU. Michigan has been Michigan (sorry ESPN and Mark May) while Ohio State could go undefeated for the next 12 years and most folks would yawn. The reality is that the Buckeyes are in another stratosphere than the other Big 10 teams. Bucs get a W and then hope that someone else slides...
Florida vs FSU- Will Muschamp is a guy walking around with 3rd degree burns on his booty after losing to GA Southern last week. Did the Eagles have a prolific passing game? Nope. Actually, they never completed a pass. Apparently Muschamp and Jimbo are best friends and vacation together. Key up Dionne Warwick and "That's What Friends Are For" because Jimbo may have his own issues with his Heisman (atheist according to autocorrect) candidate, Jameis Winston. I have no idea of his religious affiliation, but I assume the Noles are going to show no mercy and Jimbo will buy Will a cocktail or 2 on the next beach vacation. The Gators may have the worst offense ever. This game will be as exciting as a Kardashian Christmas special. Noles win big.
Clemson vs South Carolina-Dabeau vs Darth. The last time I remember this game being really exciting was slobbering Lou's Gamecocks with that game ending brawl. A classic! I see no Floyd Mayweather activities in this one, but the suspense of one of those Maury paternity episodes. I say Gamecocks by a beak.
Auburn vs Alabama- In this edition of the Iron Bowl, we have the Tigers led by Nick Marshall (who was asked to vacate the UGA sandbox) while Bama is led by Mr. Little Debbie Oatmeal Pie, Nick Saban. Bama is número uno and looking to win their 3rd BCS Championship in 3 years. The Tigers lone loss came at the hands of Big Z& the LSU Tigers. Will they show Katherine Webb's hamburger commercial during the game? Pass the ketchup to Auburn. How can I go against the Tide? I can't. McCarron (and his attention monger mom) and company get a w.
Gosh, I have so much to say. Soon. Very soon, Tattoo. Welcome to the island!
Friday, November 29, 2013
Saturday, November 23, 2013
Squeaked these picks in right before kick off!
It's not you guys-it's me. I've been a slacker in the posting section. What do we need to catch up on? Bulldogs? Mostly bark with little bite following a fast start. Falcons? Can't rise up when the balloon has several holes. Kim and Kanye? Kim is bringing the crop top from the early 90s. Girl should have left that grave alone and thrown a Pearl Jam concert tee on top. My kids? I've implemented an "if you lie to me I will take $5 from you" rule. At this rate, I will have a fully funded IRA by Christmas that will be the envy of Bill Gates. The laundry? Still plentiful with a cornucopia (holla at you, Thanksgiving!) of single socks. Alex Rodriguez? Still taking a page from the Lance Armstrong novel and saying it wasn't me. Oh, and what will he tell his daughter about his suspension? I don't know Alex. Maybe you can follow the suspension explanation story with why you are a self absorbed tool who also cheated on her mom with escorts during your marriage. Your daughter might be bothered more by that. Right. And .lest I forget to mention I celebrated 11 years of marriage( that would be the equivalent of 77 to our canine friends). I bet my husband can relate to the dogs. I'm just too legit to quit. Please note that sometimes I choose what I want to happen, but I'm just as accurate as any expert which means not very. But omg, how cute does my boy Kirk Herbstreit look on GameDay today???Now on with my picks....
Let's go ahead and start with the alma mater. Did you see Auburn vs UGA last week? Seriously. It was like someone gave you a big box of candy with a huge ribbon and sparkly paper, and when you opened the box you discovered it was filled with chocolate covered prunes. This week the Dawgs have the ever so hapless Kentucky Wildcats coached by one of the Stoops posse'. (I know we aren't talking b-ball, but UGA even beat Kentucky in hoops last year which is a sign that your program is in true rebuilding mode.) I say Murray goes out with a bang at his last home game. I have this Todd Gurley move I do at the end of my kickboxing. I'm trying to hold on to my last shred of dignity so I won't post video. Dawgs take out the Cats. Meow.
Baylor vs Oklahoma State-Baylor is undefeated and they haven't gotten this much attention in Waco since that whole David Koresh fiasco. I know Baylor is fast but can they go undefeated? I haven't seen the Cowboys this season but I'm sure they have a QB named Shooter or Gunnar. I'll take Cowboys in an upset.
Mizzou vs Ole Miss- The Tigers are licking their chops at the chance to seal the deal and win the SEC East. Their QB, James Franklin, was injured against UGA and Matty Mauk (what self respecting quasi grown up calls himself Matty?) has kept them in the lead. Ole Miss has that Robert Kimdeche kid who were on sports radio here every day last year talking about where he was committing. I'll take Ole Miss in the upset.
Michigan State vs Northwestern-Ah the Big 10 Crap Sandwich special. Do you remember a few weeks back the prognosticators were saying that it would be a shame if Northwestern went undefeated and didn't get to play for a national title? Whaaaaaat? Would anyone like to guess how many games Northwestern has won since then? Yes, you sir in the Captain Crunch shirt. 0? Correct. Michigan State has only one loss but Ohio State is the star in the Big 10 galaxy. Spartans get a win.
Texas A&M vs LSU- Crack out the grape hater-ade because Johnny Foozeball is coming to town to visit Big Z and the Mad Hatter. Johnny's off field woes in the preseason are behind him now as famous Jameis at FSU has stolen that spotlight. Will he repeat as Heisman winner? Mmmmmm. Not sure at this point. Neither team is really showing any stout D, so I will take Aggies.
I gotta wrap this up because this is the 3rd electronic device I have tried to type this post. I had visions of photos but nothing has cooperated. Go Dawgs!!
Let's go ahead and start with the alma mater. Did you see Auburn vs UGA last week? Seriously. It was like someone gave you a big box of candy with a huge ribbon and sparkly paper, and when you opened the box you discovered it was filled with chocolate covered prunes. This week the Dawgs have the ever so hapless Kentucky Wildcats coached by one of the Stoops posse'. (I know we aren't talking b-ball, but UGA even beat Kentucky in hoops last year which is a sign that your program is in true rebuilding mode.) I say Murray goes out with a bang at his last home game. I have this Todd Gurley move I do at the end of my kickboxing. I'm trying to hold on to my last shred of dignity so I won't post video. Dawgs take out the Cats. Meow.
Baylor vs Oklahoma State-Baylor is undefeated and they haven't gotten this much attention in Waco since that whole David Koresh fiasco. I know Baylor is fast but can they go undefeated? I haven't seen the Cowboys this season but I'm sure they have a QB named Shooter or Gunnar. I'll take Cowboys in an upset.
Mizzou vs Ole Miss- The Tigers are licking their chops at the chance to seal the deal and win the SEC East. Their QB, James Franklin, was injured against UGA and Matty Mauk (what self respecting quasi grown up calls himself Matty?) has kept them in the lead. Ole Miss has that Robert Kimdeche kid who were on sports radio here every day last year talking about where he was committing. I'll take Ole Miss in the upset.
Michigan State vs Northwestern-Ah the Big 10 Crap Sandwich special. Do you remember a few weeks back the prognosticators were saying that it would be a shame if Northwestern went undefeated and didn't get to play for a national title? Whaaaaaat? Would anyone like to guess how many games Northwestern has won since then? Yes, you sir in the Captain Crunch shirt. 0? Correct. Michigan State has only one loss but Ohio State is the star in the Big 10 galaxy. Spartans get a win.
Texas A&M vs LSU- Crack out the grape hater-ade because Johnny Foozeball is coming to town to visit Big Z and the Mad Hatter. Johnny's off field woes in the preseason are behind him now as famous Jameis at FSU has stolen that spotlight. Will he repeat as Heisman winner? Mmmmmm. Not sure at this point. Neither team is really showing any stout D, so I will take Aggies.
I gotta wrap this up because this is the 3rd electronic device I have tried to type this post. I had visions of photos but nothing has cooperated. Go Dawgs!!
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