This is sooooooo unlike me to update the blog while the SNF is on, but in the words of Aerosmith, "I'm Living on the Edge." That song doesn't even compare to one of the all time greatest hair band hits by Warrant (RIP Janie Lane) "Cherry Pie", but I wasn't sure how to incorporate that song into this paragraph as I am not Betty Crocker or auditioning to be a guest on Iron Chef.
Allegedly, you should google yourself to see what comes up in the search. Obviously, most of the teens I know have not done this as they would know that no privacy (I prefer the British pronunciation of priv-acy) settings means the entire world sees those pics you took of yourself posing provocatively in your undies in front of the mirror. Yeah, you think only Ethan and your 1498 friends see it but that's not the way that works. I have googled myself before , but decided to do a bit more of an indepth search. I know that I'm not incognito on this blog, but for research purposes let's say that my name is Tara Snookipops.
Lo and behold, there are 6 Tara Snookipops in the U.S. One is apparently an executive in Hollywood. I love celebrity sleaze, but have not achieved that kind of status in my life. Another Tara Snookipops is a volunteer firefighter. Definitely not me as I am terrified of heights so that trek up the ladder would make me panicky. She also has no security settings on her Weight Watchers blog, and her goal is to lose 75 pounds. Props to that Ms. Snookipops! I would like to drop 10, but after reading her blog all I wanted was a fork and a cake. Then there was the Tara Snookipops who is president of her sorority (haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!) and that is MOST definitely not me nor would have ever been me. Apparently, she is very involved in all things pan-hellenic and is using sisterhood to right the wrongs of the world. Another Tara Snookipops sells coffee mugs and looked like she walked out of an episode of "Jersey Shore." Nope, not me either. Good for all of these ladies for chasing their dreams, some minus sunscreen.
High up in the search I came across something that made me giggle. Someone had written the following post in the New York Times "Tara Snookipops is a Hot Tamale!" What????Could that be me? Did I have a secret admirer? Had this person caught me on a good hair day? Had the guy behind the counter at the Quik Trip used this forum to explain why he never makes me pay for a beverage? I was freaking giddy and on the verge of blushing. I was nervously getting ready to click on the link hoping that the author was David Beckham or at least Jason Taylor. Jason, if you ever read this (and I know you won't) I positively turned into a pile of putty after that ASPCA commercial you did with your dog. Yes, I am a pathetic individual. Back to the link. No, I clicked on the "Tara Snookipops is a Hot Tamale!" to discover that it was from an admirer, but not of this Tara. Apparently that Tara plays field hockey in NJ and is quite the object of affection of a gaggle of guys. Sigh....
What did I learn from this project? There is only one me, thankfully.
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